Hello CBMers!!!
This is just a silly idea I had and well...I suppose, I thought I'd share it. Perhaps get a little chuckle.
OFFICES OF CBMZ
MARTY: "My name is Marty Stein, and I started the CBMZ to show the world every side of their favorite characters. We don't shy away from anything, me and my team of five editors here. Plus an army of photogs all around the universes helping us out. So what do we got?? Bryan?
BRYAN: "I got, Wolverine coming out of this bar slash karaoke place, called 'Kitty's Karaoke'. Guests tell us that inside, Wolverine did a butchered version of the Rick Springfield classic 'Jessie's Girl'. Instead of Jessie, he changed the lyric to Scottie's girl. And he was pretty drunk."
MARTY: "Scottie? What's the significance of....oh.....OH!!!!!!!"
BRYAN: "Yeah! Which also helps explain Scott Summers' recent kickstarter program, KWC. Which stands for, Keep Wolverines in Canada. Basically he wants the government to deport Wolverine back to Canada."
MARTY: "Looks like tense times at Xavier's school. Wow. Good job. Alright, what else do we got? Zak?"
ZAK: "Ok, I got reports of Superman getting...just getting trashed in this hole in the wall bar, just outside Metropolis. Onlookers say, he got so drunk, he went to the nearby junk yard and started fighting an imaginary figure he called 'Clark'. Now rumors persist that Superman has invited a bunch of other superheroes together for something possibly called, 'Super Fight Club'. Not sure if there is any truth to this as the first rule of Super Fight Club is...."
MARTY: "Yeah, yeah, we saw the movie. Interesting though, Superman must be having hard times. Good stuff. Umm...Marc, what do you got?"
MARC: "You think that's bad, we have footage of Peter Parker, hair dyed jet black, walking down the street, and get this, snapping his fingers at people as he dances! The next day, we caught up with Peter and asked him about his bizarre behavior, his answer? Get this. Straight up History Channel. He claims the whole thing was caused by aliens!!"
MARTY: "Ooook, that's downright weird. Christy! What'ch you got?"
CHRISTY: "Well, we got this story that the new Batman is spreading around this odd rumor of banging Superman's mom! Citing the film 'Hollywoodland'. (check it out, Ben Affleck totally hooks up with Diane Lane in it) People say, he's doing this for a special reason."
MARTY: "Which is???"
CHRISTY: "So that Batman can claim to be the world's greatest detective and mother[frick]er."
MARTY: "Right...Joss, what do you got for us?"
JOSS: "I gotta follow that! Ok...well, insiders are saying that Nick Fury and Phil Coulson are going to appear on that show, 'Shark Tank'. Apparently they have some new invention for firemen to use, the Halo Hydrant!!"
MARTY: "Why, you son of a gun. You just wanted to get that on the show. Well, thanks for checking us out."
Thanks for reading.