Hello CBMers!!!
Not very long ago I sat to write an article that would attempt to entertain the masses in great delight and enthusiasm. Make the reader feel alive and enthralled, engaged on a visceral level. And I sat there thinking about this, and two things ran through my mind. One: the Mighty Mouse theme and two: baseball. So I said screw writing that defining, stroke of genius article; just write about CBM characters and their favorite baseball team. Sweet. That article was limited to the world of Marvel CBM characters. So it's only fair to do a follow up featuring DC CBM characters, but with a twist. The twist? Ha, it's basketball teams!!! Crafty bastard.
Batman - San Antonio Spurs
Black as part of their team colors? Check. Plus they also have silver, which resembles gray. This team would be perfect for Batman, their frequently underestimated. Plus, they always find a way to win. Also, bats live in their stadium. Once during a Spurs game a bat flew down, grabbed the board, and dunked the hell out of the ball for the Spurs. Unfortunately, Manu Ginobli went to give him a high five and ended up killing him! Look it up, Manu slapped the crap out of bat! Plus they're constantly the victims of some nefarious criminal. During this year's finals, the AC unit of their arena malfunctioned and broke. Coincidence? I think not!! BANE!!!!!
Superman - Phoenix Suns
No surprise here, Superman gets all his powers from the sun. The bad thing about Phoenix for Superman? To much desert, not enough buildings to knock down! He needs the atmosphere of that, like back in Metropolis. You see, he frequently plays "horse" against Lex Luthor. One time while playing, Supes called for a shot over the rubble pile. Lex was all like, excuse me, but which rubble pile? Thanks to you, there are thousands of rubble piles here.
Green Lantern - Boston Celtics
Certainly you could of seen this one coming. The Celtics primary color is green, a color utterly vital to Green Lantern! Like, cause it represents his ring's powers...you know...luck! Like in, how much luck did this movie have to get produced? No, no, just kidding. If I were Green Lantern I create a construct of some celebrity pulling on a chain. Because with that luck stuff, I was just yanking your chain! I know, it's willpower. Hell, the Boston Celtics practically will powered their way to a championship not to long ago! They beat out Lebron James in that year's playoffs. You know they have that in common with Green Lantern, overcoming a big headed rival!
John Constantine - Washington Wizards
John's a spell caster, and that's what a Wizard is known for as well. Well, that and fighting villains who have no nose. :-o Wait, wait that's not right. :O Better! See, no nose! Anyway, John could guide the Wizards to some inter sports play! Challenging the Anaheim Angels and New Jersey Devils to a special game of Baseketball with hockey sticks! Sweet.
Thanks for the read everyone! Remember, like the last article this is all just for shits and giggles. Hopefully you chuckled ever so slightly. And if you did enjoy, be sure to click that red gloved thumb.