I actually enjoyed 2014's Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle. It was obvious Nickelodeon marketed the movie to a younger generation. Unfortunately, two-year-olds don't get to vote on rotten tomatoes. The film sits a 21% critic's score on rottentomatoes.com -- I used to get whoopings for bringing grades like that home from elementary school.
As a father of three, I woke up this morning to the smell of dirty diapers, but surprisingly, the stinkiest smell that hit my nostrils derived from the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows Trailer. "Fans" (the adult kind) begged the studio for the turtles they remembered from their childhood and sadly, they got what they wanted. In 2016, we will be getting a 1990s blockbuster.
Don't get me wrong, I loved mohawks and rollerblades when I was six years old, the only problem is, it's 25 years later and my three year old son will not understand the reference. The dress attire isn't even the worst part -- I could've sworn I saw Tyler Perry's Razzie Award acceptance speech fall out of his lab coat, the "It's Tricky" Run DMC music is a hint we'll probably get more 80s music than a Adam Sandler rom-com, and somebody please tell the turtles to "TAKE THE CLOTHES OFF!"
I'm not going to lie and tell you this movie was one of my most anticipated, but it's not to farfetched to believe my son and daughters were anxious to see what tricks Michael Bay (director, cough cough, I mean producer) and Nickelodeon had up their sleeves. I guess the only trick they had was to try and please everyone except their targeted fan base. Kids don't get a rottentomato vote and they may not be able to purchase a ticket either, but sadly, I don't even think the people who have the funds to watch this movie would give it up willingly -- hopefully you prove me wrong, but I doubt it.
About The Author:
I fell in love with movies at a young age. The first VHSs my dad bought me when I was 3 years old were Action Jackson and Splash (both which contain nudity by the way). Growing up in South Florida, my neighborhood was extremely dangerous so my mom rarely let me play outside. In a house with 5 kids, we got bored easily and watching movies alone, wasn't enough to keep us entertained. We would always point out little things to make the films more fun. We couldn't afford blockbuster rentals so library cards were the next best thing. By the time I was in the fourth grade I had read the back summary of 60% of the films from the A-L section. I love movies period.
My sister and I came up with an idea that every movie is someone's favorite movie years ago after watching a Charles Bronson marathon on WB39 (I hated his movies and his face looked like a baseball). Since that day, my origin story began -- I discovered my super powers. I couldn't fly or shoot X-ray vision, but I was able to find a way to defend bad movies people hate and convince them to love them.