The Iceberg

The Iceberg

Cold so cold

Fan Fic
By Ben100000 - Nov 13, 2010 08:11 PM EST
Filed Under: Fan Fic

Batman TRX Episode 4,Season 1
Iceburg Lounge Manager Office
A short man sits in a big chair the man has a big top hat and some orange hair coming out of the sides


Goon #1: Mr. Cobblepot, the shipment is going to be made by Sionis
Mr. Cobblepot turns his chair around
Cobblepot: Well let's get it back, i mean i'm the Penguin not the Chicken
Goon #1: Well ok how
Penguin pulls out an umbrella
Penguin: Killing the Batman
THEME SONG
Batman: This is worthless
Batman throws a Batarang into a wall
The Batarang expoldes
Batman: It just blows up the wall
Alfred walks in and hands Batman a letter
Alfred: A letter
Batman opens the letter
Batman: The Mob
Alfred: Sir are you sure
Batman: I know it
Alfred: How will you stop it
Batman: Two words, Matches Malone
Alfred: Sir that's in maxuimum lockdown
Batman: Not any more
Alfred opens a door
A Hat, Suit and Pants are in a glass case
Batman throws a Batarang at the glass
It expoldes
Batman: Well that was easy
Batman takes the suit, hat and pants
Iceburg Lounge
Penguin, Black Mask, Riddler and Matches Malone sit at a table
Penguin: Malone you have the guns
Matches Malone: Yep
Penguin: Lets go
Malone: Whats the plan i forgot
Penguin: Kill the Batman
Malone grabs Penguin and puls him into the shadows
Malone ziplines to the roof
He changes into Batman
He jumps on a table and it breaks
Batman: PENGUIN
Batman throws alot of Batarangs all over the place
Batman grabs them and runs out
The Iceburg Lounge explodes
Blackgate Prison
Cash throws Penguin into a cell and locks it
Batman: Don't you work at Arkam
Cash: I work at both
Batman runs away
MCU Roof
Gordon: Did you have to blow it up
Batman: It was a warning
Gordon: Ok
Batman ziplines to another building
About The Author:
Ben100000
Member Since 10/3/2010
DC & Marvel Team Up In Awesome Fan-Created Infinite Crisis Video
Related:

DC & Marvel Team Up In Awesome Fan-Created "Infinite Crisis" Video
The Fantastic Four Director To Helm New Planet Of The Apes Movie... Which Will Not Be A Sequel To Kingdom
Recommended For You:

The Fantastic Four Director To Helm New Planet Of The Apes Movie... Which Will Not Be A Sequel To Kingdom

DISCLAIMER: As a user generated site and platform, Comic Book Movie is protected under the DMCA (Digital Millenium Copyright Act) and "Safe Harbor" provisions.

This post was submitted by a user who has agreed to our Terms of Service and Community Guidelines. Comic Book Movie will disable users who knowingly commit plagiarism, piracy, trademark or copyright infringement. Please CONTACT US for expeditious removal of copyrighted/trademarked content. CLICK HERE to learn more about our copyright and trademark policies.

Note that Comic Book Movie, and/or the user who contributed this post, may earn commissions or revenue through clicks or purchases made through any third-party links contained within the content above.

Do you have what it takes to write for us?
Want to contribute?
LEEE777
LEEE777 - 11/13/2010, 11:12 PM
It is COLD in here!

Ouch...

Two thumbs down and no comments till I pop in...?

Dude lol, go and look below you how to make a Fan-fic article... theres plenty of examples!

Do you really think people are interested in a whole season of BS?

Just do the whole lot together...just some friendly advice and maybe do a fan casting with it.

Seriously Ben, look at other ppl's fan-fic and then think why everytime you put an article up you get far from good comments...

Just a thought and btw its ICEBERG! ; P
LEEE777
LEEE777 - 11/13/2010, 11:26 PM
Sorry if I'm sounding abit of an a$$ but I've said nothing and read the comments you get, enoughs enough Ben, heck you don't even try and make it pretty with a picture or two?

Meat Ben, MEAT!

Ppl need to chew on your article! : D

I could say something else, but I wont, it'll be lower than what Teabag would say heh heh!
DetectiveCinema
DetectiveCinema - 11/13/2010, 11:37 PM
LEEE777 I left a comment, but it wasn't a positive one so that's probably why it got deleted.
CuteAsian
CuteAsian - 11/14/2010, 12:41 AM
exactly stop clogging up the fanfic section with your shit.
Vafrous
Vafrous - 11/14/2010, 1:00 AM
This is really campy...
SGA
SGA - 11/14/2010, 1:11 AM
LEE is right. You need meat. If this was an attempt at trying to make it a script, then you did a lousy job. You need to research and read scripts to get a feel for proper formatting.

You need to set the tone for this by using whole sentences, better dialogue, and descriptions of the settings. Deadshot is right, this is kind of campy. It reminds me of Adam West's Batman. If that's what you're going for, then great, but if not, then you need to make that clearer.

Also, I don't know what Mr. Murdock's comment said, but you shouldn't abuse the power to delete comments. Whether it was rude, constructive criticism, or downright hateful, he has a right to express himself. That's what these comment boxes are for. The only reason you should ever really delete a comment is if it's spamming advertisement.
SGA
SGA - 11/14/2010, 1:16 AM
One more thing, Ben....How old are you?

I've been kind of browsing through your stuff. It's far from great, but with a little organization, it could be better.

If you're younger, say, 13 or younger, I could easily forgive the poor formatting and campy dialogue. If you're 14 or older, you're Middle School age and should know better than to write like this.
DetectiveCinema
DetectiveCinema - 11/14/2010, 2:06 AM
SGA Cheers man, thanks for the shoutout.

All this guys work has been just like this. He's just being lazy.

Check out my Flash cast above this one. Lemme' know what ya think, constructive crtisicm is welcome. :P
Vafrous
Vafrous - 11/14/2010, 6:25 AM
"Whats the plan i forgot"
Lame...

@Ben,I doubt english is your first language based on your spelling errors

@Murdock, Awesome cast...quality work!
Vafrous
Vafrous - 11/14/2010, 6:25 AM
"Whats the plan i forgot"
Lame...

@Ben,I doubt english is your first language based on your spelling errors

@Murdock, Awesome cast...quality work!
Ryden
Ryden - 11/14/2010, 8:41 AM
Jeez...Ben stop posting your stuff. I'm sorry if I'm being a dick, but everything you post is really bad. There's never any format, or as some other have said, meat to it. It's just random bursts of terribley campy/cheesey dialouge. I'm gonna take a guess and say you're probably young, so maybe you should look at what others have doen and try to emulate what they've done. Put more effort into it.
LEEE777
LEEE777 - 11/14/2010, 12:48 PM
Guys @ : D

Yeah @ BEN... what SUPERDUDE said, and its good to comment back as well! :)

You will get much nicer comments when ppl know your talking back dude.
Ben100000
Ben100000 - 11/15/2010, 12:03 AM
SGA@ I'm 13 and ya i'm still campy i'm working on the dioulge
Ryden
Ryden - 11/15/2010, 8:25 AM
@ben1000- It's just like, a lot of stuff doesn't make sense. Why would Batman just keep exploding stuff with a batarang?
Joslezio85
Joslezio85 - 11/15/2010, 12:24 PM
Dude.....If you were to e-mail me back. I would gladly help you. But, I can't if you don't contact me...
SGA
SGA - 11/15/2010, 6:41 PM
@Ben....Ok, see, that's understandable, you being 13. Your writing skills will develop with practice and proper guidance.

gibbyblaylock
gibbyblaylock - 11/18/2010, 11:22 PM
Ben 100000, you've got a lot of work ahead of you. Develop your characters more, make us care, make us know them. Tell us "WHY" things happen. Craft ideas and actions based on the logic that the character's machinations would inspire. Many other things...

BUT DO NOT GIVE UP!!!!!!!!!!!

I give you an INSANE amount of props for being 13 years old and having the GUTS to post your fan-fic. Keep it up, DON'T quit!
Ben100000
Ben100000 - 11/19/2010, 8:12 PM
gibbyblaylock@ Thanks
Ben100000
Ben100000 - 11/20/2010, 9:32 PM
SuperDude001@
13
yes
i know of them
saddly
no
Related Headlines
Latest Headlines

Hot Headlines Hot Headlines

Sci-Fi & Fantasy

Anime & Manga

Gaming

Horror

Cartoons & Animated Features

Auto Racing

Action Movies & TV

Pro Wrestling & MMA News
View Recorder